Oh my....just.....my vag wants to hide under the covers

A guy running for sheriff in NH said some scary stuff. From TPM:

In an interview on Wednesday with local television station WMUR, Szabo said he believed sheriffs were granted special powers under the Constitution. That means, he said, he would be empowered to arrest or even use deadly force against doctors for providing legal abortions for women.
“I would hope that it wouldn’t come to that, as with any situation where someone was in danger,” Szabo said. “But again, specifically talking about elective abortions and late term abortions, that is an act that needs to be stopped.”

Is anyone else like...yea...no. And why in God's name are you giving Sheriff Arapaio ideas?!!!

Oh, oh and look at this nugget from a guy running for PA Senate:

An Associated Press reporter asked Smith, “How would you tell a daughter or a granddaughter who, God forbid, would be the victim of a rape, to keep the child against her own will?” Smith replied, “I lived something similar to that with my own family. She chose life, and I commend her for that. She knew my views. But, fortunately for me, I didn’t have to. She chose the way I thought. No, don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t rape.” What was it, then? His daughter had “a baby out of wedlock.” Asked if that was similar to rape, Smith stammered, “No, no, no, but … put yourself in a father’s situation, yes. It is similar. But, back to the original, I’m pro-life, period.”

 So, premarital sex=rape?....sorta? (not at all). Can you guess that this guy is a Republican as well?

Here is what President Obama said:

Rape is rape. And the idea that we should be parsing and qualifying and slicing what types of rapes we are talking about doesn't make sense to the American people and certainly doesn't make sense to me. So what I think these comments do underscore is why we shouldn't have a bunch of politicians, the majority of whom are men, making healthcare decisions on behalf of women.

 Don't you just want to hug him FOR FUCKING GETTING IT? (Ok, so I don't like that the whole discussion ignores the fact men can be raped but to be fair he was responding the that awful Akin guy saying that ladies who get for real raped can't get pregnant.)

God, the Republicans should just shut up about sex and rape and abortions already.

Also, Herman Cain would like you to know that if Obama is reelected there will be no pizza for anyone ever again......? Yea, this guy was a front runner for the GOP nomination.

The crazy train picks up steam.......

What do you do when you get the sads?

I buy my self things. Weird things

First I bought this. In all honesty, I've been thinking about getting one of these for like 4 months because my couch is atrocious and needs to be covered...by microsuede.

Then the sads set in something fierce. I got drunk by the pool and when I got back to my computer, I ordered this:

To be fair, I have had my eye on this for a long time it was just the $10 cost seemed daunting. But I was like FUCK IT. I really like Firefly and Serenity and I will have this bracelet featuring a sweet Captain Reynolds quote.

Then I broke my favorite glasses. So, Sunday I reordered them while at the same time ordering this epically weird/fun pair of glasses:

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Finally, I purchased myself a $7 bottle of beer. SOMETIMES WE ALL JUST NEED PRESENTS. And I never shop. Except this weekend.

Perhaps the best headline EVER

Happy Friday, you beautiful people.